01 April, 2008

new book

I am going to write a book titled “The Belize Bug Bite Book”. My legs look like they did when I was 13 years old, all scabby and red. There is the infamous mosquito, but then many others; two of which I have named the red dot bug and the blister bug. The red dot bug bite is just that a little red dot on the skin as if someone took a fine red marker and touched you with it. Under the innocent looking red dot is another story. The bite becomes a large (larger than a quarter) size hard lump which begins to hurt and then itches worse than 10 mosquito bites put together, then it hurts again, then itches again. I have tried different methods such as digging a needle into the dot and flipping off the little red top; or squeezing the hell out of it in hopes of releasing the poison…neither provided much relief with the latter causing more pain.

The blister bug, which I found out, is called the dr. fly. A bite from this insect causes the area to swell and itch like hell, but when you itch it (or even if you don’t) the bite turns into a blister which then bursts and continues to leak a clear fluid and eventually (if you can refrain from itching it for a couple days) it scabs over until, in a moment of weakness and desperation, I grab a loofah (which are grown on the farm) and a bar of soap and run to the river to relish in the masochistic act of pure scratch gratification while pushing the thoughts of what you are doing to your skin out of your mind.

For those of you who are still reading on, there is a third (and final) character that will henceforth be called “the bite that ruled them all” (btrta). Btrta is the worst and just downright nasty. The area will develop a hard little swell with an unseen bite mark and will hurt like hell for a couple days; an achy kind of pain with intervals of sharp painful blasts. After that, following suit, it begins to itch. But, when you scratch it, it become even more painful, but you can’t stop itching because it feels sooooo good to scratch it even though it is soooooo painful at the same time…like having incredible sex on a bed of nails…or something along those lines.

So, when can I look forward to visitors?

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