29 November, 2006

tienes suerte

Life, ahhhh isn't it interesting? Back in September I had applied for about 20 jobs all over the world. I was undecided whether to go back to Spain or just what to do. It felt good to basically have the ability to go anywhere...well, since I didn't hear back from an organization with a paying position, I figured I would go back to Spain and teach English.

I have been doing that and relatively content, although I would not want to make a career out of it. I am just getting into the swing of things and am doing really well in learning Spanish..and then...I received an email from the NYCLU (New York Civil Liberties Union)
http://www.nyclu.org/ wanting a phone interview with me regarding the Exec. Assistant job I applied for back in Sept. My mind went crazy of course (anyone who knows me can predict what happened next)...I started thinking non-stop about that job. Should I have the interview? Do I want to move back to the US? Could I make enough to pay off my student loans? blah blah blah. I google mapped their office to see where it was in NY and even emailed my NewYorker cousins, John and Helena and asked about cost of living, wages, etc. I was overwhelmed with thoughts: Was this job right for me? Will I be happy in NY in the winter? Do I want to be an executive assistant again??

I let it totally occupy my mind for 4 days! It's all I could think about and I finally had to make up my mind not to think about it and just to breathe and "feel" the situation. Yesterday I went to work and when I came out of the train station lo and behold, my bike seat was stolen again! Yes, the soft cushie seat I just bought and was so proud of was gone. I just stared in disbelief and semi-controlled the rage boiling up in me. When I got back to my apt. (after riding the seatless bike home) I remembered the extra seat my friends had given me when they moved back to the US. I then got to work trying to figure out how to put it on my bike and then how to lock it so it will never be stolen again. (I know I am getting off the subject, but that is how my mind works, so bear with me). I took a shorter cable lock and rigged it through the seat and around the frame of the bike. Basically it looks hilarious (according to my roommates) but it's secure and I didn't have to buy a new one.

This morning I woke up and thought about NY (I had not emailed my reply back yet). I thought about how much I want to learn Spanish and how that would not happen there but then pushed it out of my mind and got ready for work. I arrived at the train station at 9:27 and saw that the train was still there although it was supposed to leave at 9:25. I leisurely walked down to the train since I did not have to be at work until 10:30 and I could always catch the next one. I approached the ticket man, who always makes me smile for some reason. I said "Buenos Dias" and he said "Buenos Dias, tienes suerte". I said "si" (although I had no idea what he said) and walked down to the train. I found my seat and sat there controlling this huge urge to giggle and then I took out my dictionary to look up what suerte means. Suerte means luck (and tienes means have), so he had told me that I have luck (since the train happened to be delayed & I didn't miss it). As I sat there I was overcome with a feeling of belonging and I couldn't stop smiling. It then hit me: I am very very happy here and do not want to leave. I am still open to a job somewhere else if it feels right but for now, I am staying.

Buenas noches little train ticket collector man, you will never know your unintentional contribution to my future.

1 comment:

Karl said...

By whatever means, I'm happy that you came to peace with your decision.